i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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