i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
