Where did you get a picture of my penis
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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