I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
