He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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