you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
