We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
