i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
