You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
