Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
