Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
