I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
handjob tips. give me some.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
