So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
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