I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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