There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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