I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
did i just pee glitter
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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