I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Randomize
