We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
