i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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