There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
