Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
