it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
