Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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