so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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