I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
