I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
ttyl tear gas
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
