So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
