me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
