Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize