Jerry, you need to find god
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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