I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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