Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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