Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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