Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
