i don't plan on having that self control this summer
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
