just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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