Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
