so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
