are you still at the devil's house?
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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