This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
