These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
