dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
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