stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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