O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
