Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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