we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
