Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
