fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
