so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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