my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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